I was worried sick yesterday. I waited and waited but there wasn't any news from botak head. I called him several times at 9 plus all the way till 10 plus. No answer. No replies. I swear I was going crazy. I was so exhausted. But I lay down in my bed, thinking what the hell baby was doing. Was he injured? Did he exert himself? How is baby? The thoughts almost made me crazy, I swear.

Baby called me at 11 plus. And I was really pissed at him. I didn't talk to him nicely. And I told him I'll ignore him for some time. But my anger only lasted till this morning. I missed him so much. So damn much. I realised, I too was in the wrong for not being understanding. It wasn't his fault at all. I was being too paranoid. I shouldn't act like that. But sometimes thoughts go wild. I'm getting stressed up for nothing.

Anyway I suspect there's sth really wrong with me, internally. But I have no time for the doctor's. :( I hope it's not sth cancerous and can be treated. Really afraid sth bad will happen. :( All I can do now is wait for baby boy to be out. So he can accompany me to the doctor. Sigh.

Today work was alright. Used the mac com to do my video editing. Really noob at macs, but I managed to produce sth at least. And I guess it wasn't that bad, given the fact that it's my 1st time using Adobe Premiere. It's really good to learn sth new. At least when MP starts, I can make use of it. :)

Left at 6. And zoooom-ed all the way home. Super exhausting. Feel like breaking down. And I'm still in pain. Argh! Don't know why is this happening to me. I miss you baby lovey boy. Muack. Really wish I can see you soon.