I hate the fucking army. It's taking all his time away from me. I don't fucking even have 10 sms from him, I don't fucking have the time to talk, even for 10 fucking mins. Wtf are they doing to him? I get so cb irritated when I talk halfway and he says he need to sleep. That's like so rude of the fucking army. I can't even tell stories anymore. OCS is so much different from the BMT. I hate it. I fucking hate it! I am so alone, so lonely. I am not self-pitying myself, but I feel so fucked up and.. Yes, fucked up is the only word to describe my feelings.

The army is taking away all his time, I don't even know who I can turn to anymore. Nobody cares, nobody can be there for me all the time anymore, and there's nobody I can pour my sorrows to. I hate it, I HATE IT SO MUCH. I JUST FEEL LIKE KILLING MYSELF.

Now I understand why girls leave their bfs when they're in the army. I fucking know how they feel. But one thing for sure. I AM NOT THEM, and I WILL STICK TO HIM LIKE A FUCKING SUPERGLUE. So people out there who thinks I can't fucking bear with it, GO TO HELL. I will be Mrs Lau, that's one thing for sure.(unless he doesn't want me la)

Anyway, I'm just feeling very horrible right now, so I'm here ranting. I really.. really fucking hate the army. _l_