I've been a really bad gf. Really really bad. Sometimes the impact only occurs after you've said those nasty stuffs. During the process, you just wanna vent it all out, and you don't feel bad or guilty or anything. It's always the aftermath. I feel like the lousiest gf ever. Me and baby are totally different characters. I guess he's the only one who can tolerate me, who can tolerate all the shit I've been giving him.

I know sorry has been said a million times. I know I tell myself I shouldn't do this. But I guess my patience level is the one obstructing everything, which is ruining everything. I really need to go for some serious anger management classes, I wonder if that really works.

Baby never shouts or scolds me whenever I misbehave. Instead, he's always there teaching me to be a better person, telling me what's right and wrong, being so patient and understanding. Complete opposite of me. I can never be like him, although I really wish I could. Sigh.

I can't let this gem of mine go. Never will. This gem will stick with me no matter what. And me, as a normal piece of rock, will try its best to transform into a beautiful diamond. Baby, will you give me time to change, even though if it takes 10 full years or maybe more? I wanna be a diamond, and not a normal piece of trashy rock. I wanna make you happy, I wanna make you feel the luckiest guy around.

It's gonna be our official one year soon. Time flies. Even though it's just one year, I've come to learn many wonderful stuffs. I've learnt to love, and to change to be someone better. I also have become a much happier person, in fact, I feel like the luckiest person ever. One year may seem short, but I feel like I've been with this wonderful guy for a decade already. My love for him is so deep I can't express how much it is. Never have I felt it before. I have to admit I love this feeling. I hope our love stays till eternity.